Well, to cut to the chase, the scan was stable. There were no new growths or changes in the size of the affected lymph nodes, which is great...I guess. On the other hand, that's just it: it was stable. It had not regressed at all and that part is a major letdown. Last scan showed about 30% improvement, whereas in this one, we're holding our own, no more.
I liken it to being out in the ocean swimming for shore. After several hours swimming, you check your position by sighting some landmarks and realize that after all that effort, you are no closer than before and are still far from shore. The optimist in you wants to say, "hey, at least you're not being swept farther out to sea". But the part of you that wants to really be kicking cancer's butt (all of you, that is) is disappointed that landfall is still a ways away.
As I write this, I look out my window and see the same French lady who walks by our house every day. Lorraine, I think her name is. She lives below us, down a hill at Cristwood Park, and is over 90. Every day, she trudges up the hill, rain or shine and takes a quick rest on the neighbor's garden wall, and then ambles off at a quick clip on the way back down the hill to her apartment. Has to move fast, as dinner starts at 4:30 down there and she is most likely first in line, though you wouldn't know it judging by her slim physique. Anyhow, she is an inspiration: never stops moving, makes progress, and has a lot of motivation despite her hunched over back and needing a cane. And she is 90! She is making progress! I want so much for Gabrielle to be making progress and to get to that wonderful age. If (and when) she does, no doubt some admiring husband will glance out the window at her and marvel at her energy. She has plenty now, despite the neutral CT scan. Let's hope for a reversal of some of the lymph nodes soon.
Dr. M. tried to be upbeat. She said that the effects of Doxil are slow on the front end, but "durable" so they should last a while. Let's hope so. So for now, it's "stay the course," faint not, and all that. In my mind, I would rather have "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead." But that's how it goes. And now, I have to sign out, because Gabrielle is chopping at the bit to go for a walk. I think she wants to go catch up with Lorraine and maybe sneak in line for dinner at Cristwood.